Yep.

I have chewed gum almost non-stop lately to fight my morning sickness (which, BTW, should actually be called "all-day sickness"). My kids have noticed the chewing and have asked, but apparently today it became more bothersome to them...which is how the following came about:

Little J (you know it...all good conversations start with him): Guys, that is the third piece of gum Mrs. Overman has spit out this morning!

K: I know. She chews gum now.

[more chatter and speculation about why I've been chewing gum and snacking all day]

Me: Okay, okay, would you like to know why I've been chewing gum?

All: YEAH! (they are so nibby...always wanting to know more...I'm sure they think I live in a box in the cafeteria)

Me: Okay, I'm pregnant. Do you know what that means?

All: YEAH! YOU ARE?!?! WHY? WHERE IS THE BABY?

Me: I haven't had the baby yet.

D: Why?

Me: Because it hasn't been born yet.

T: When will you have it? Soon?

Me: No, not until the end of the year...close to my birthday.

N: Why does it take so long to have a baby?

Me: Good question.

Relationships.

One of my little girls gave me a whole lot of insight into her family today.

"Mrs. Overman, you know about my stepdad? Well, he was actually just my mom's boyfriend. They broke up, though, because she was just his moneymaker. Did you know he was giving all my mom's money to his girlfriend?"

What did I say, you wonder? It was something like, "Oh, okay..."

Toenails.

For the record, you must know: I HATE feet. Hate them.

My friend's mom was a sub next door to me this week and she came down and said, "Hey, I don't know if I should send this kid to the nurse or not. Do you have a minute?"

I said, "Sure. Tell me."

"Well, they are changing their shoes for P.E. and he can't get his socks on because his toenails are too long."

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?!?!

I wanted to throw up right there. Ugh.

Fireflies.

Somehow we ended up headfirst in a discussion about fireflies and how in the world their "butts light up."

Here's Little J's theory (who else?):

"Well, it's just like farting. They make their butt go and then it lights up. When they're done farting, the light goes off."

See if this makes sense to you.

Because it doesn't make sense to me!

Little J said, "Mrs. Overman, you know, if your brain was a sink, you couldn't figure out what
2 +4 is."

Sure.

Writing Honestly.

One of my colleagues and I have been teaching writing together and starting something about writing honestly. You know, secrets, stuff you don't want anyone to see, maybe you want to padlock this stuff, embarrassing stuff, etc.

Here's what came out of that:

"I wonder why my mom and dad fight. Then why do they kiss after that?"

"I really miss my grandpa because he died. And I love him so much."

"This morning at breakfast I burped and then farted. Then I got to school and I had to again, so I went in the bathroom and farted some more. Then I burped and it was funny. And it just kept going on and on and on."


You know we were all laughing...

Writers write things they want to remember.

That was my mini-lesson main idea for writing workshop today and apparently I didn't do the most fabulous job of conveying my expectations for this project...which actually turned out to be pretty hilarious.

Here are a couple of the things they wrote:

• "I have to remember my birthday or I'll just have to stay seven again. And I have to remember Halloween or I'll have to wait another whole year for it."
• "Make sure you always spray your lizard or its tail will fall off. [note picture of lizard with brown tail]. If his tail falls off, it doesn't grow back as nice as the first one."