Underwear

I'll assume you're familiar with the character "Dash" from the Incredibles (I think...it's been awhile) for this story.

One of my kids today was supercharged--talked non-stop, hyper, etc. They were all working at their seats, talking amongst themselves, when I said, "Please find the word dash and glue it in the right place."

All of the sudden, Hyperkid yelled, "HEY! I'm wearing Dash underwear!"


DEAD

SILENCE.


The entire class (seriously, even my kids with ADHD) turned around to look at Hyperkid. No one knew what to say, but finally one managed to say,

"B, you really shouldn't say that to girls. Or your teacher."

Valentine's Day

One of the other teachers told me that she sent her list of students' names for Valentine's Day home as a letter that ended with "Sincerely, Mrs. M." The day of the Valentine's party one of her boys (who, BTW, addressed his own cards) handed her a card because he couldn't figure out who it belonged to. It was addressed as follows:

To: Sincerely

From: Eric

Bribes.

Apparently Little J said a really bad word on the playground yesterday over and over and over again like he does with everything. This of course got him a swift ticket to the office. The recess teacher told me it went like this:

Teacher: Little J, you're going to the office for saying that.

J: No! Please don't send me there. Please! I'll do anything! What if I give you money?



Seriously? Does that work at home?

Watermelon Seeds

Ah, the age old question of little kids: Will you grow a watermelon in your belly if you accidentally swallow the seed?

We read a book this morning about a mouse who swallowed a watermelon seed by accident and was scared he'd grow a watermelon in his tummy, so his best friend swallowed one too to make him feel better.

One of the kids said, "Yeah, you won't grow a watermelon in your belly if you just swallow one seed!"

They all agreed until G said, "Yeah, but if you swallow a whole bunch of them, then drink a lot of water and open up your mouth every time the sun is out you will!"

I thought for sure they'd all say, "No you won't." But instead I heard a chorus of, "Oh yeah, that is true!"

Bad Weather

Yesterday we left school in the early afternoon because of some nasty "blizzard-like" weather. One of my more nervous, high-strung little girls said, "Mrs. Overman, I sure hope the roads aren't too bad because my gloves are so thick I can't cross my fingers!"

Turds.

You know you want to read this...even if you think the word "turds" is inappropriate.

Plus, the star of the show is none other than Little J.

Ah, Little J...haven't heard from him in awhile, huh?


I'm reading the book "The Willoughbys" by Lois Lowry to the kids. They are LOVING it...it's just hysterical...about these kids who are trying to get rid of their parents and the parents are trying to get rid of their kids.

So yesterday in the book the parents went on vacation and hired a nanny, who talks about the kids eating raisins in their oatmeal. The oldest child says, "Raisins are turds!"

Little J came up to me privately after we finished reading it and said, "You know Mrs. Overman, I always thought meatballs were turds."

Reese Cups

Here's a snippet of lunch conversation I had with a little girl the other day while she finished off a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup:

K: You know, my sister thinks these are gross.

(Sister is four, BTW)

Me: Oh yeah? Why?

K: Well, she had her first one last night and she ate the entire thing with the brown wrapper on. Then she felt sick. So she doesn't like them anymore.