I'm back.

As good teacher-mothers do, I put some absolutely adorable pictures of my son up on my bulletin board behind my desk.

Here is the conversation that resulted from that with a little girl named J:

J: Mrs. Overman, my cousin looked like me when I was a baby and my other cousin looked like your son.

Me: Oh...what?

J: My cousin...she looked like your son when she was a baby. You know...chunky.

MIA

So I've been MIA for awhile obviously...had a baby, been a little busy with that...I'll be back to school in November. Thanks for reading!

Paper jam.

I know, I know...it's been like 30 days and no post. Not gonna lie...my almost-third-graders are VERY careful about what they say. In first grade, it was all or nothing, say anything, etc.

We are SO over being "little" kids. We're smart, big kids...or so we think.

However, leave it to my wonderful Little J to break the mold and not care what others think.

We have been laboriously researching and typing our findings in the computer lab (did you know it takes an average eight-year-old approximately three hours to type a paragraph?).

Anyway, Little J finished his typing today. I promptly sent the document to the printer which promptly sent back the message "paper jam: document failed to print."

Me: "Ugh. Another paper jam!"

Little J: "Oh no! Paper jam! Who would put jam in that printer? Is there jam on my paper? How did this happen?"

Oh my.

Yesterday was not a great day teaching-wise. I feel like they nearly killed each other; spring break is STILL two more days away.

I hope we can make it.

But that's our own personal problem.

So one little girl, T, was quite naughty yesterday. Apparently she was even naughtier than I thought she was because I only knew about the top part of the note. Here it is in its entirety (I totally wish I still had my scanner...you would love to see it):

"Dear Mrs. Overman,

I am sorry it slipt out of my mowth. Will you forgive me for a bad talk? Srcll (circle) yes or no.
_____________________________

J,

I am sorry for me saing I should have my dog poop on your head. Will you forgive me? It was mean. Srcll yes or no. Sorry.


My mom is yelling"

Honey, would your mom want your teacher to know this?

Remember B from the last post with the goofy comment about the fact that he was wearing cartoon underwear?

He had another whopper comment yesterday:

"Mrs. Overman, you know how I was supposed to get my new video game yesterday? Well, I'm getting it today instead. We couldn't get it yesterday because my mom had diarrhea and couldn't get herself off the toilet."

Underwear

I'll assume you're familiar with the character "Dash" from the Incredibles (I think...it's been awhile) for this story.

One of my kids today was supercharged--talked non-stop, hyper, etc. They were all working at their seats, talking amongst themselves, when I said, "Please find the word dash and glue it in the right place."

All of the sudden, Hyperkid yelled, "HEY! I'm wearing Dash underwear!"


DEAD

SILENCE.


The entire class (seriously, even my kids with ADHD) turned around to look at Hyperkid. No one knew what to say, but finally one managed to say,

"B, you really shouldn't say that to girls. Or your teacher."

Valentine's Day

One of the other teachers told me that she sent her list of students' names for Valentine's Day home as a letter that ended with "Sincerely, Mrs. M." The day of the Valentine's party one of her boys (who, BTW, addressed his own cards) handed her a card because he couldn't figure out who it belonged to. It was addressed as follows:

To: Sincerely

From: Eric

Bribes.

Apparently Little J said a really bad word on the playground yesterday over and over and over again like he does with everything. This of course got him a swift ticket to the office. The recess teacher told me it went like this:

Teacher: Little J, you're going to the office for saying that.

J: No! Please don't send me there. Please! I'll do anything! What if I give you money?



Seriously? Does that work at home?

Watermelon Seeds

Ah, the age old question of little kids: Will you grow a watermelon in your belly if you accidentally swallow the seed?

We read a book this morning about a mouse who swallowed a watermelon seed by accident and was scared he'd grow a watermelon in his tummy, so his best friend swallowed one too to make him feel better.

One of the kids said, "Yeah, you won't grow a watermelon in your belly if you just swallow one seed!"

They all agreed until G said, "Yeah, but if you swallow a whole bunch of them, then drink a lot of water and open up your mouth every time the sun is out you will!"

I thought for sure they'd all say, "No you won't." But instead I heard a chorus of, "Oh yeah, that is true!"

Bad Weather

Yesterday we left school in the early afternoon because of some nasty "blizzard-like" weather. One of my more nervous, high-strung little girls said, "Mrs. Overman, I sure hope the roads aren't too bad because my gloves are so thick I can't cross my fingers!"