Friday, December 3, 2010

Playing House.

We were having recess inside today and some of the kids were playing "house."  The dad of the house, Bode, came running up to me and said,

"Mrs. Overman, I am soooo not ready to have kids yet."

I was already cracking up.

"Why's that, Bode?"

"Well, see my kids over there? [points to a group of kids sitting in the corner]  They're not going to bed like I said, so they're just going to have to sleep in their pretend puke.  I wish they'd just go to bed.  I think I might just never have kids."

"Bode, you know, it doesn't get any easier when you're a grown up.  Good luck."

Thursday, November 18, 2010

Ah, finally something funny.

I love my class this year.  They rock.  But they're just not...umm...hilarious.  Usually.

Today one little guy, B, was late because he went to the dentist.  It kinda just wrenched his whole day, really.  He's a perfectionist and hates messing things up; he especially hates when I circle incorrect answers on his math papers for him to correct.

"I think you just like circling things today, Mrs. Overman!" he'll say.  "Those aren't really wrong!"

Today he missed a lot on his math facts paper, so I circled them to be corrected.  He went back to his seat and cried.  Poor kiddo.  I finally had the sense to lighten his situation with some humor, but he ended up lightening it for me instead:

Me: B, what happened to you at the dentist? Did they clean out the math part of your brain in addition to your teeth and that's why you missed all your facts? 

B: know, I did feel something tingly up toward my brain after they cleaned this tooth [points at molar].  And you know what else happened there? I got ceilings on my teeth so I don't get cavities!  Guys, did you hear me! I got ceilings!  Yeah! mean sealants.  But whatever.

Monday, November 8, 2010

SMART Board.

I have a SMART Board, a.k.a. God's greatest gift to teachers in the digital age.

A.k.a. an "interactive whiteboard."  

Just picture a giant computer screen that you use digital markers with.

Well, much to our disappointment, our SMART Board isn't interacting with us.  *sniff*

The tech people were in my room making a last-ditch effort to fix it before they called the SMART company people, and one of my boys goes, 

"You know, for being a SMART Board, it's really not so smart!"

Friday, September 17, 2010

Sometimes we wish we didn't have our own bathrooms.

Don't read this if you think bathroom stories are inappropriate--or you're opposed to the word "butt."

My colleague in first grade shared this with me today.  She has a squirrley class, to put it mildly.  She'd finally gotten them calmed down and working quietly on their math papers when one little boy asked to use the bathroom.  He went in and apparently was in there for a very, very long time.  She finally heard a little voice in there saying:

"I'm wiping my butt now!!!!"

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Sometimes you have to laugh or you'll just cry.

My wonderful colleague has a doozy of a class this year.  This is what she told me today:

"Oh my has been really I decided to put on some soothing music for the kids when they came in from recess.  Totally didn't work.  One kid was under his desk playing, another girl that never is quiet was screaming that he was under his desk playing, another kid was trying his darndest to dance to the soothing music...then I look back, and guess what Glue Eater's Friend is doing?  Oh yes...she is cutting up paper towels and her math paper that has yet to be completed and is glueing them to another paper.  So I asked what she was doing, and she said, 'I'm glueing because my friend Glue Eater likes to eat glue so I'm making her something to eat.'"

We had to stop our converstation because two boys were trying to kill each other before our very eyes.  Repeat after me:  "I will get through this day, I will get through this day..."

Bearded lady.

We were sharing our work from Writing Workshop today.

You know from some past posts like this one about a dead cat in a dryer that this can get really...interesting.

Here is what T said today:

"Okay, guys.  This is a map of my house.  Oh...I think I forgot to draw the other bathroom...oh well.  Okay, so here's my dad.  Here's me.  Here's my sister.  She has a moustache because I don't like her."

Of course, the other boys thought this was the most ingenious idea they'd ever heard and suddenly were begging for more work time to add moustaches to their own much-despised sisters. 

I congratulated myself on teaching drawing detail and writing how you really feel after this lesson.  I see the glass half-full, don't you think?


Saturday, August 28, 2010

We have a bathroom in our classroom.

So you can only imagine some of the adventures, both good and bad, that occur in there.  But I won't tell you all of them in one post.

I will, however, tell you the most recent bathroom adventure in our second-grade room.  Ahem.

Little guy I'll call Loudie (he's just kinda loud all the time...and it's hysterical) went into the bathroom and was in there for a long time.  Like a really long time.  He finally came out, went over to the sink, and washed his hands.  Meanwhile, a little girl I'll call Cutie entered the bathroom after a long wait.  Like a really long wait.  All of a sudden, she came out yelling, "Ew! It stinks in there!"

You should know by now that second graders can't just leave well enough alone.

I mean, hello, the first week of school Loudie farted twice during the same Community Circle session.  (May I just add that he wasn't embarrassed AT ALL and said "excuse me" like he just sneezed or something normal.)

Anyway...if you and I are warned that something stinks, we'd get far away from said stink, right?  Not true of second graders.  Cutie kept yelling, "Oh, Loudie, that's nasty!  You stink!"  to which Loudie replied, "Hey, whatever! I had to make a poo." Then Cutie's friend came over, apparently to smell the stink for herself and said, "Oh, man, Loudie, you're sick! Whoa!"  More people started joining all the stink-smelling until yours truly broke up the celebration and rained on their stinky parade.

If you like this bathroom story, you will find many other related bodily stories on this lovely blog.  If you don't, might have to find another blog to entertain you.

Driving Age.

Picture this: we are taking a spelling test. I say, "Your next word is car.  When you're 16 you get to drive a car."

Then I hear this from one little guy:
"Well, guys, I hope you know you better grow up faster because they're changing the driving age to 18."

Holy moly, how old is this kid?

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

I'm bleeding.

Fresh second-graders are great about letting you know they're bleeding.  Here is my conversation that led me to think I would make a great nurse.

W: Mrs. Overman, I'm bleeding.
Me: Oh no! Where?
W: Here, on my ankle. See? 
Me: Mmm is kind of bleeding! Do you want a band aid?
W: Nah.  I can live with it.
Me: Well, I'm glad you're so tough.

See? I could be a nurse.

Writing Ideas.

Today were were listing possible writing ideas and Mrs. Ayres (my wonderfully dear friend and colleague...what a great combo, btw) was having the kids list ideas that were good for writing at school and ones that were better saved for home.  She said, "So what are some ideas that are better to write about at home?"

Here are some of the answers:
  • gory things
  • violence
  • bad shooting people in the head or kissing
Yeah...kissing is just the worst.


One of my kids came running up to me this morning and said,

"Mrs. Overman!  Did some girls come over here and tell you I was cussing?  Because I wasn't.  You know, just in case."

I wasn't suspicious until now...

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

What would you say?

This is what was tattled to me today:

"Mrs. Overman, Z called me a TOILET!"

I just bit my lip while Z apologized.

Thursday, May 6, 2010

What a Weird Day.

My kids were in a crazy mood yesterday, which I secretly enjoyed.

Here are three fabulous quotes I heard:

"Hey Mrs. Overman, I won the hearing test this morning!  Yep, I had to take the hearing test--and I won!"

"I had to go to the doctor, so that's why I was late.  I have this skin that keeps coming off behind my ear, you know?  And it itches.  So the doctor had to write me a new permission slip for more cream."

"I agree with Junie B. Jones.  Kindergarten should be called something less than first grade, like half grade, because you learn in Kindergarten.  But preschool--it should be called zero grade because you learn NOTHING there."

Monday, May 3, 2010


Ah, Writing Workshop.  Again.  We love it.

During the precious, quiet (ha!), time for hard work, one of my kids yells, "Hey, does anybody know how to spell danger?"

Then this other kid yells her own name back: "L-I-L-L-Y!"

Friday, April 23, 2010


One of my little guys got 100% of his timed math facts correct for the first time in like 160 days this morning.  As he got up from his chair, he said,

"Wow, I have a huge wedgie!  Hmm.  I guess wedgies must make me work hard!"

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Guinea Pigs.

My kids are so much more mature this year than in years past, but every once in awhile--thank goodness--they forget about being cool and are just their vulnerable selves.

Yesterday I had some paper pattern blocks I wanted the kids to punch out for a math lesson.  This was the first time I'd done the lesson this way, so I said, "Okay guys, I'm not sure if this will work or not, but you can be my guinea pigs and try it." 

"Okay!"  They all said.

We tried it...the blocks were the wrong size and didn't work, so I said, "You guys can just play with them or take them home or whatever when your math is finished."

So a few minutes later, a little girl, L, came up to the table for me to check her math work.  She looked at the paper pattern blocks beside me and said,  "So when I'm done I can do this guinea pig thing?"

Me:  "No, there is no guinea pig.  That's just a saying.  If you're a guinea pig for someone, it means you test things out for them to see if things work."

L:  "Oh. we'll just do the guinea pig thing tomorrow, then?"

Me: "No, dear.  There is no guinea pig thing.  You can play with these blocks if you want and test them out like a guinea pig."

L:  "Hmm.  So I guess we're just not going to do the guinea pig activity at all today?  Okay.  You'll just bring the guinea pig tomorrow, right?"

Me: *sigh*  "Sure."

Guess what? It's tomorrow and the guinea pig has successfully been forgotten.

Friday, April 16, 2010


I'll try to remember this the best that I can.

We were having a discussion about Easter and why we celebrate it.  Okay, we weren't because I teach in a public school; my kids were having a discussion about Easter.

These are their takes on Easter:

"Well, basically, the pilot (Pilate) wanted Jesus to die so he killed him."

"God and Mary got married and then they had Baby Jesus."

"Jesus could have escaped all the beatings if he wanted to but he was just too tired because they were bad."

Ah, Writing Workshop.

When you let kids have free choice during Writing Workshop, sometimes you have no where to go but down.

But you have to go down laughing.

This is what one of my kids wrote for his Slice of Life story yesterday:

"I was at home.  My dog puked on the couch.  Then my mom and dad came home.  It smelled like crap.  We cleaned it up.  Then my dog went into my room and puked on my bed.  It smelled like crap."

At least he's using repetitive phrases.

Sweating my leg.

It was hot yesterday.
It was Spring Picture Day yesterday.
Our pictures were at the end of the day.

You do the math.

Anyway, one of my little guys was wearing dress pants, a long-sleeved button-down shirt, and a clip-on necktie.

And it was 80 degrees.

So he put the necktie in his pocket during recess.  I saw him running around without it and said, "Hey M, where's your tie?"

M yelled, "Oh, it's in my pocket, but it's sweating my leg now so I'm just gonna leave it right here on the bench."

Carp. Yeah, like the fish.

One of my little guys is wearing my favorite shirt of his today.  It's from some kind of restaurant in Florida or something with lots of seafood and the back says

"What a bunch of carp."

Monday, March 22, 2010

A Cool Breeze.

Ah, my darling Wheels.

She is currently crafting a fantabulous poem called "Wind" that goes like this:

The wind
Reminds me of
A fan
A cool fan
And a strong breeze.

We were conferring about exact language so she chose to use the words "strong breeze" in her poem.  Apparently it stuck because a little while later I said, "You all need jackets to go outside today" to which Wheels replied, "Look, Mrs. Overman, see my jacket?  Now I'm totally ready for a strong breeze!"

She's so poetic.

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

The Scariest Thing You've Ever Lived Through.

My question for our community circle yesterday was "What is the scariest thing you've lived through?"

I got the following answers:

"I was in a car wreck."
"When I broke my leg."
"When my grandma died of cancer."
"When I was sick."

"Well...I'd have to say that I'm the only girl with three brothers and that is very scary."

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Spelling Test and a Movie.

One of my little girls came up to me and said this:

"Oh, Mrs. Overman, I'm so worried about my spelling test!  If I miss more than one my mom said I won't be seeing that new movie for seven years!  That means I won't get to see it until I'm fifteen!"

Then I heard her telling her spelling test partner who was helping her study:

"Listen, I have to really practice hard right now because seven years is a long time and I need to see that movie!  I'll be old by then!"

Science Fair.

We recently concluded our science fair and one of my girls was quite distressed that her mother just didn't seem to have time to help with her science project and therefore she didn't get to do one.  She, however, bounced back with her plan for next year:

"Mrs. Overman, you know what I'm going to do my science project about next year?  Bunnies.  I'm going to see how fat they can get in a day."

Thursday, February 25, 2010


Don't get me started on girlfriends in second grade because I just won't have it.

Anyway, we are doing strategies for "attacking" nonfiction...we made our plan for "attacking" the origami directions...the kids had to follow directions independently for making origami (whew...)...and hey, presto!...they did it!

Okay, I would be lying to say they all did it.

Most of them got it.

Then there were the few (aren't there always a few?) who were like, "But I don't know how! What do I do now?!?!"

To which my reply was, "What are you going to do someday when you can't figure out how to put your new TV stand together?  I won't be around to help you then.  What do you think would help you figure this out?"

To which he smartly replied, "Well, by then I'll have a girlfriend and she can help me."

Fine, you win.

Thursday, February 11, 2010

Being an Astronaut.

I love spying on my kids' conversations.

T: You know, when I grow up, I'm gonna be one of those guys that flies into space. I'm gonna go to Jupiter.

J: No, T! You can't go there! Don't you remember? Boys go to Jupiter to get more stupid-er!

T: Oh, you're right...I guess I'll just have to go to Mars then.

Thursday, January 28, 2010


One of my little boys has had a terrible time with his math facts and it's mostly because he doesn't want to take the time to do them. He'll bring me a paper with 25 of 50 facts incorrect because after the 25th one he just writes the numbers 13 or 11 for the rest.

You get the gist.

So today he brought me his page of 100 facts and only three were wrong.

Me: Oh, C, you are doing so much better at this now!

C: Yeah, I know. I used to suck at this, but now I'm better.


Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Betcha didn't know this.

You know the old eighties saying, Girls go to college to get more knowledge, boys go to Jupiter to get more stupid-er?

This is Wheels' take on that:

"Hey, did you know this saying? Girls go to home to get more smarter. Boys go to school to get more sillier."

Monday, January 25, 2010

Ah, Wheels.

Well, our dear Wheels is certainly coming out of her shell as of late. Here are two really good episodes from her today:

Wheels: Mrs. Overman, did you know that the speed of things is like four billion million eight ninety sixty trillion?

Me: The speed of what now?

Wheels: The speed of anything with wheels and gas. Except for alien vehicles. They use sugar for their gas fuel, so their speed is different. I saw that on TV once.

If you're confused, join the club. I'm confused and I was there!


Wheels: Oh, Mrs. Overman, E is having such a problem! Her chest hurts. She had a heart attack yesterday and I think she's having another one right now!

Me: Honey, kids like E can't have heart attacks. They're too young and E is very healthy, so she is just fine. Thanks for telling me, though.

Friday, January 22, 2010


Today Wheels (remember her from the last couple of posts?) came up to my desk and said, "Hey, Mrs. Overman, I'm going to do this dot-to-dot now."

Me: Oh, wonderful...but I should warn you, that dot-to-dot is kind of hard. But I think since you're so smart you'll do just fine.

Wheels: Mrs. Overman, it won't be hard for me. You know why? Because I am the CHAMPION of dot-to-dots. I am VERY good at them.

Tuesday, January 19, 2010


Let me preface this post by saying that I HATE feet.

Except for my son's because they are awesome.

But he's eight months old, so he has supercute feet.


At the end of each day, the kids and I clean up our floor. I'll say something like, "Please pick eight things up and put them where they go."

Then they have to show the things to me because, let's face it, we don't live in a perfect world and some of them lie.

So they all were cleaning and bringing me their collected items:

E: Two crayons, a marker, an eraser, and some paper scraps.
L: Three pillows, some paper, a tissue, a pencil.
I: A paperclip, some homework, and an eraser.

Then the nastiest one of all:
R: Some paper, a pencil, some trash, and a toenail.

Ugh...get that away from me.

What I Want To Be When I Grow Up.

I have a very mature class this year (read: they don't do goofy stuff too!). However, I do have one little stinker that keeps me hoppin' to my blog.

We'll call her Wheels.

That's just a personal nickname I have for her, and unfortunately, I can't give you the background info on it.

Anyway, we were sitting in community circle the other day, sharing what we wanted to be when we grow up. It went like this:

R: A teacher.
B: A scientist.
E: A doctor or a vet.
T: A teacher.

You know, normal things. And a lot of teachers.

Then we got to Wheels:

"Well, I want to be one of those people who goes around the whole world and just picks up everyone's litter. You know, trash? I won't be charging very much, though. I mean, if you litter like nine pieces of trash, you will only have to pay me like one dollar. But if you litter like ninety pieces of litter, you'll have to pay me like one hundred dollars."

Excellent. We'll keep that in mind.

Thursday, January 7, 2010

New Year's Eve.

I overheard this discussion between three of my kids yesterday:

C: Hey! Why is the year 2010? I thought it was 2009.

E: Don't you remember, C? On New Year's Eve the year changed. We moved ahead another year.

C: Oh yeah...I stayed up really late that night and watched this shiny ball fall and then I saw lights that said 2010...then all these people were kissing! Ugh!

R: You know, C, you're really not supposed to be watching that kind of stuff. It's not good for you.